you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize