i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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