if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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