Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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