he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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