you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Randomize