i just made my gag reflex go away.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not ubering you a puppy
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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