I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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