I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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