Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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