youre lurking in front of me
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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