he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Can I color on your dick again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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