so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
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