Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize