I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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