shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
It's never too late to be topless.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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