Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
is wine microwaveable?
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize