Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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