Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
50% drunk capacity currently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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