I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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