dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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