ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
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