You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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