he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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