i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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