Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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