Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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