last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize