and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize