Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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