Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boobs are out for the taking
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
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