**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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