I should be sponsored by Trojan
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Randomize