their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize