Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize