Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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