my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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