i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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