how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
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