there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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