Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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