Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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