now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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