Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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