**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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