the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize