with your own penis?
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize