Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize