I must be too annoying 4 u.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this just has baby written all over it
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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