i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
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